About the Project

What is “Looks Like Love To Me”?

We’ve come to realize, through the inquiries of so many, that our love story is an intriguing one. With two married women, their husband, and now their cosmic-twin babies…we often raise eyebrows in public and queries among friends and family.

This project is an attempt to share our story. But not only that, to share our belief that love can take whatever form it needs to in order to create a fulfilling and happy life for those involved.

Our goal is to create a documentary of the story from the meeting of Dani and Melinda, through their marriage, finding Jon, their pregnancies and birth, and on until the babies Oliver and Ella Lynn become one year old.

This website holds some exciting news, blogsvlogs and “mini-sodes” for people to follow along while we create the big documentary. It’s a place for people to find out a bit more about our lives whether you’re family, friends, supporters, critics, or someone we gave a business card to when we met the other day.

The mini-sodes and documentary intend to explore the topics that everyone is interested in:

  • Our double pregnancies and parenting philosophies
  • Our July 18th, 2014 wedding celebration (read the blog and see the teaser here!)
  • Sex – roles, toys, gender
  • Communication – jealousy, conflict resolution, making decisions
  • Our daily life on the farm and city!

We’d also love to incorporate some of these elements into the project:

  • Interview other polyamorous and non-monogomous relationships, people, and families
  • Investigate human sexuality and family dynamics with professionals (researchers, professors, psychologists, etc)
  • Reach out to people on “the street” throughout the US (and abroad?) to understand their perspective on love and relationships – sharing the project with them.
  • Seek to uncover what makes a relationship healthy, regardless of it being poly or not. Are there fundamental tools that we need to partner with one, two, or any number of people in a healthy way? (Communication, release of ego, honesty, etc)
  • Advocate for equality! Perhaps a reason non-monogomous relationships are “unheard of”, even though it is really quite common, is because there are no rights to support!

Why Are We Doing This?

After the innumerable inquiries about our relationship over the past 2-plus years, we decided to unravel on film…to share our story, our love, and our growth. Here are some of our many goals with this project:

  • Be proud and open about our love, showing that love is something you create how it works for you
  • Share our story with friends and family (especially family that doesn’t see us often and may not have an understanding on it all)
  • Learn about each other in the process – it’s amazing the opportunities to understand yourself and your partner when putting yourself under a microscope
  • Reach out to those that explore alternative and non-monogomous relationships – to hear their stories, empower their pride, and bring light into a often misunderstood flexibility to love

What are the future goals of the project?

We shy away from the idea of becoming a “Reality TV Show”. The drama, intrusiveness, and corporate interest that is usually found in them are far from our purpose. Especially with the kids. But we have been approached about this and consider it with the very real understanding that it needs to be “perfect” for us and our family’s values. We’ll see how that goes!